maybe if you didn't yell 'buh duh duh da duh da dats all folks' when you came she wouldn't have left last night
i forgot beer had calories. that would explain alot.
Remember that crazy chick I've been ignoring and said I wouldn't bang her again? Can we start that again part today?
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm fighting fire with fire. When my parents interrogate me about what I was doing last night, I tell them the truth. Every disgusting, awkward detail. I'm 23 now and they need to get used to it.
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
I really resent how she stayed home and ruined my plans to watch sci-fi and masturbate.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
To be honest, waking up to 20 naked people in my house was not the weirdest thing to happen to me in the past 24 hours
There is a cooked ham in the washing machine.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
everything I love is going to destroy me, so if coconuts are the answer, so be it.
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