would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
The more I look at him the more I wonder why anyone would ever want any of his features to be a part of their childs face.
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
He told me to fuck off at some point in the night. I think it was right before he jumped out of a moving car trying to get to another bar and made Abby cry.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
So I come home yesterday and my brother is like "watch this" and it turns out he's been retraining my dog to come running when u say "anal"
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
Looking through my moms phone and find a pic if a dick. Scarred for life.
I have a sixth sense for dads free balling in gym shorts
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
He told me my car had really nice leather seats right before he jizzed all over them.
Randomize
