i justawanted to let you know that illi aalways be thwew for ui and o qill waasag youer dog whenebvet u wsnt
Just saw an Asian kid crash into the bike rack with his bike. I love sitting outside the engineering building.
I was so high I couldn't tell if they were goosebumps or herpes.
Sprained my ankle at sky zone REST ICE COMPRESSION ELEVATION AND SHOTS it'll all feel better soon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
No no don't get confused. We do chemistry homework on Thursdays. We screw on Fridays. Other than that, Words With Friends is our only communication five days a week. We are NOT dating.
I had a dream where I was about to fight you but you were dressed like a greek god and had just killed a werewolf with your bare hands
Is it bad that I have more guilt over drunk eating Doritos than hooking up with my ex's best friend last night?
Let's make an agreement. No drugs until you finish all your homework. I'm hiding them as we speak.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
in other news i got caramel vodka poured on me. upside, i smell amazing
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
she hand cuffed me to the bed naked, jumped off the dresser naked, hit her head on the fan and knocked herself out. when her mom came home i had to call her for help, she could have died man...
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
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