I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
I'm going to use my one free fuck up card tonight.
What'd you do?
Its more like what im about to do.
jersey shore has given me a vivid depiction of what things will be like for me once i get to hell
I just found 3 condoms in my math textbook... in the probability section... Under dependent and independent events...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Also there's a dick sized hole in my tights...should I be worried?
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
oh god my hair smells like rotten vegetables, sweat, and tequila. I wanna party with your neighbors every night.
see that vagina ? that vagina means business
Is it weird that i want a guy to ask me to homecoming by spelling it out in meatballs?
THATS VERY WEIRD
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just had some kinky fun in the back seat of my car behind a Ralph's in south county. How's your thanksgiving eve?
If you buy me a steak I will make the extra effort to ride you. If not, I'm just gonna lay there.
This time last year I was crying in a church parking lot without shoes or a bra, so the years can only go up from here
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
They were so sore! Either I have bed bugs or you were biting my nipples last night and don't lie to me.
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
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