so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
I want to poop on a bird, just to show them what it's like.
We had sex on my friends waterbed ..after that the whole school kept asking him if he had fun getting "sea-sick" last night.
This is so stupid. Now I have to call the party planner and tell her that the break up party is off. They decided to get back together.
A shower wasnt enough to wash off the shame but at least it took care off the blood.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
I'm sitting here bra-less eating jalepeno candied bacon. You know you want this.
Coming.
I say that because you at one point were like a mama spider covered with baby spiders only you were a man covered with strippers.
I will have to bone him sometime between now and July so he will move all my shit again
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
My boyfriend and my fuck buddy are going to the strip club together... Should I be concerned?
My sister can't give you a handjob and us still be bros.
AND ONCE AGAIN THE HENNESSEY MAKES ME A SUPER SAIYAN
Oh for fuck's sake, is that why the couch is in the pool???
Randomize
