My right nipple has been called many things but never a ghost pig
I thought all girls wanted is to get a boner
you want to re-phrase that?
I just made $100 from people paying me not to get naked at the party... I need those P90X dvds
i dont need a football game to get drunk and yell at my tv
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i am already firmly committed to doing irish carbombs w/ 12 different people, and the st pattys day party doesnt start for another 24 hours. i may die
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
I wanna die of smoke inhalation. In a huge teepee. Or one of those big things kids in kindergarten have that you throw up in the air then sit inside of.
U offered to motor boat her and it somehow turned into u two going on a sunset cruise in Newport. At 3am.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Multiple bruises and a hell of a headache later, I have still to find out where the fuck I picked up the bottom half of a mannequin.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I made it to work. Still drunk. Definitely pregnant.
It doesn't count as "finding the lesbian" if you fuck a straight girl!
You showed me your butthole that's like a mating call in other species
Mike Pence got the fuck boy eyes though
Randomize