No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
woke up with food on the counter from chipotle, taco bell, green cactus, and on the border take out. explain?
you were trying to get this Spanish chick to sleep with you. you were showing her how much you "loved her native food."
I just spent all my babysitting money on red cups and beer.
People still let you watch their kids?
how do I tell him nicely and in french that we can't have sex anymore because his huge penis will ruin me for other french men?
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
So..he has a girlfriend BUT she rarely writes on her wall and is only in 5 of his 371 tagged photos and her default pic is her with some other dude. It cant be serious
Oh my god you need to get off of facebook.
College is a time for personal growth. Meaning it's time to start using those pickup lines on randos at dive bars.
I'm eating my emotions. I am no longer interested in anybody other than my own hand and vagina.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
Like what did he say to his host family? The girl I causally sleep with on the weekends is coming over?! And they thought "well lets feed her dinner"
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
I can't go to Fassler and not immediately think about you licking a guys wife's butthole in the family restroom
He literally asked permission to hit on me
Randomize
