He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
Iiiiiii almost fall ib the lake
Just found out that I was singing john legend songs as I threw up last night. Quality.
We just used hot candle wax from our joint lighting candle to make a bunch of new small ones how stoned are we
The future queen of Norway was pregnant with a druglord's baby when she met the prince. We still have hope.
All I know is for some reason I was sitting naked in the hallway playing an invisible ukulele singing somewhere over the rainbow. I wonder why security came.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
There will be two dogs there to provide supervision. Not to worry.
i jsut feel off the bus, but its ok the driver let me back on. a woman hid her baby from me..
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
My dad got me a charm braclet....his way of trying to support my gayness....
Hell hath no fury like a woman whose gay sidekick you insult
Do not tell guys at bars about kittens you rescue. They will walk away.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Like, my vagina is jet-lagged.
Randomize
