well, tey weren't taking lap dances as payment today
i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
you know it's the perfect hook up when you don't have any friends in common with his girlfriend on facebook.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry. I really don't see what's wrong with pregaming before a wine tasting.This champagne won't drink itself.
The wine tasting is just for charity anyways...
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Your roommate is pacing with a pen in his mouth flapping like a duck. That brownie got me fucked but not enough to understand this. Come back!
He does that
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
Remember that picture you sent me of you trying to eat the flower arrangement in the bathroom at that restaurant?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
And the prospective student I was showing around had to take care of me.
Things that don't wash off in the shower: black eyes and hickies.
Why is there multiple peanut butter and toasts stuck to the fridge door?
I wasn't going to drink. Then there was alcohol so I gave that up.
Randomize