im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
and she's shaped like a lego person so that's not happening
Dude I totally just watched a girl put a tampon soaked in vodka up her vag
I need new friends
I'm in my winter jacket and nothing else. very drunk. bring bitches.
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I don't know but the stairs are covered in apples
because i know somewhere at some party, behind someones closed bed room door youre being feed a key full of mollie.
like are we talking 'quick beer' bad or 'break out the real vodka' bad
who is the naked dude on the coffee table
thats jeff, jeff is nice so don't be rude
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
i don't know what it is about you being around kids that makes me want to screw your brains out
That is the creepiest and also the sexist thing you've ever said
i think it's like a sexual celebration of not having kids
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
Did you ask Harvard boi?
Apparently he likes someone who is into being smart and a supporter of human rights ugh what a skank
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