ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
The guy dancing on me has three visible teeth. WHERE ARE YOU?
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
we played lady & the tramp with a hash brown from McDonald's....im in love.
stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I just found cold cuts in the blender. You and beefeater can no longer have unsupervised parties.
Holy christ fuck what has my trainwreck of a life come to just blew a 17 year old so help me god
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
he called us the olsen twins. we also rapped ignition much to his dismay.
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
As we're eating sushi she goes I just want to get a disease so my mom can take care of me... Great first date
after the shots you kept on yelling "this is for the dreamers"
She roared AMY HORNEY and hulk hoganed her shirt off. Fuckin marriage time bro
Fate is real! that hot chick, Megan just showed up dressed as jasmine and I'm dressed as Aladdin this is going to be cake
It's been this way for a few days. I had chick fil a on Friday so this could be an attack from the Gay Gods as punishment.
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