thx for the lesson on dirrty dancing
Somerville?? What the hell are you going to do there?
Watch a movie and have sloppy make outs OBVI. 45 Harris St. in case I die.
Racial profiling caused me to miss two cabs but the third cabs the charm - he's playing Jesus Music
Do you ever close your eyes when your having sex with your girlfriend and pretend she didn't get fat after high school?
Last night I fell down in the street (I think in someone's vomit), cut my knee up, lost my moms necklace and my license, and had to walk back to the hotel.
Like if I don't roll around in my puke, the night will be a failure.
it's kind of slutty but what the hell, so are we
Hurricane my ass. I'm riding a god damn kayak down the flooded highway if it's the last god damn thing I do, god damnit.
Just do let me go home with anyone especially I a guy with a hair sweater
I normally need adult supervision or a babysitter, but I refuse to let someone keep me from making irresponsible and wrong decisions at the bar on my last bday ill ever have in texas
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
I am going to be so excited tomorrow when I find this box of crayons in my purse
I just wiped cum off my face with baby wipes... #momlife
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
So what we learned was that it doesn't matter how skinny the stripper is, if she sits on your knee with a torn acl for two hours it's going to swell up
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