Lets drop out of school and be professionally skinny and drunk
He dyes his hair, fake tans and lies constantly. What did you really expect from him?
A better fuck for starters.
no, i dont want the owner to like me bc i dedazzled my vagina
I love you. And by the way. I found out a way for you to train your gag reflex. Elliot taught us in math.
Just got Netflix. Dexter Marathon. Still in my PJ's. Only eaten cookie dough and drinking a 40. I have never reeked so strongly of lonely .
Do you think I could put your penis on reserve for tonight or tomorrow night?
Can you tell me how this chicken finger got in my pillow case?
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
I told him I was very thankful for what his country has done to my vagina and walked away.
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
Drake has all the answers
why do guys have to express their feelings when they know your seeing someone else ? I fucked him anyways to make him feel better , and to know what he's missing.
My butt remains clenched, sir.
we tried to make a drinking game out of 4 pokemon cards you found in a drawer.
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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