Facials are how you say "I love you" in porn star.
You took all of my sister's dolls and threw them out the window and then you started talking to her etcha sketch and mr. potato head. I later found you passed out in front of Toy Story and it all made sense.
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
Drag queen told me that I have the cheek bones to do drag. That's supposed to boost my moral.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
This is simple. Just sex and high fives. No feelings.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
Im sorry i offered the man at mcdonalds your hand in marriage in exchange for some french fries
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
I'm going to need a penis the size of a bat
He sent me a text saying his breakfast today was leftover mead and some fruit salad
She’s either doing coke or thinks my cock has the Covid vaccine. Either way I haven’t worn clothes in 3 days
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