I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
I made myself breakfast and everything and then whoever's house it actually was came downstairs very upset.
Oh. They ARE dating. Kinda sad. Have such an urge to be a huge bitch and steal him but my morality is in the way. FUCK YOU MORALITY.
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
They are pre-gaming a trip to congress...not sure how politically correct the group is.
I think we can all look back on last night and categorize it under, " reason why Cory can't be left at the bar by himself"
in fingerprint form on my ass. Seriously not cool. \ni bruiiiseeee like a delicate fruiiiitttt. Heeeaaarrr the rythymmm
its not that I hate him, it's just that I wish his penis was attached to someone i like more
I hugged the bouncer as we left.
The typical response to someone smacking their vodka soaked hand on your face is not to put your face in their crotch
I did it on acid. I can cook bacon on any condition
If you were more comfortable around gay men, then you too could get wasted at the gay dance club and go home with hot girls.
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
You know shit got weird when you watched another guy shove drugs up your wife's ass and it wasn't awkward for any of us....
Randomize
