You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
3 of us had 22 margaritas. Hellllllo yellow cab. Goodbye morals.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
I no longer want to be the gay that plays in the revolving door at RelationshipDale's like a seven year old with a.d.d.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Would I be bad if I bought a pregnancy test at shoppers the same time I hand in a resume? Or do you think it would get me the job?
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
For the record, it's NEVER ok to discuss my stripper-related injuries with my fiance.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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