just found out there is no tactful way to ask your girlfriend to wax her stache. no matter what a google search would have you believe.
Superbowl and Mardi Gras a week apart. World's longest bender here I come.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
27 Signs That Someone Will Probably Be Bad At Sex
He makes this seasoned whore feel like a novice. I've met the one.
I'd like to thank you fucktards for dumping the WHOLE box of Tricuits in my bed after I passed out.
Ugh I miss culture and lesbians already
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
FYI: telling a guy his dick is more impressive than you remembered it - they don't take it as a compliment.
23 Proposal Horror Stories You Won’t Believe
He also turned out to be underage (the fucking liar) so we had to get drunk on cooking sherry
Dude. I might have just seen some porn i wasnt ready to see. The chicks were so old.
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
You FaceTimed me to show me he was sucking your tit
Out of all the things you could eat off of my tits you choose lettuce? Thats so healthy. Yuck.
I think I gave the bachelor party directions to the breweries next to my dentist so that they could take me to my appointment and pick me up afterward...