he's 24. he finally texted me instead of using facebook chat. baby steps.
Boys can't fool me. I know "want to come up and meet my dogs?" is just a nondirect way of saying "come up and meet my penis".
I wish that one Sunday morning I could wake up feeling like I have my life together.
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
i love you. like a brother. a brother that i had sex with more than once.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
God she is annoying. I am only keeping her around on fb because I want to see if her baby comes out looking like an alien or not.
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
Man I can't wait till Thursday if strippers and beer are what you consider "research"
the bartender goes "wow its so good to see you sober" and gives me a hug
Should I go bust a nut on the beach
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
Randomize
