physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Afterwards she curled up in my dog's bed and slept there all night
How mad was your dog?
i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
I just overheard this sorority girl saying "It's like trick or treting but for alcohol and with no costumes." I'm jealous.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Did you take the bag w/your drugs & cookie cutter?
Getting dome in the backseat of a friends car with Ariana Grande playing in the background was probably the most romantic part of my night
A huge penis doesn't warm the soul. Or that's what I've had to tell myself.
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
At the bar in my pajamas again
Ummm that is the 3rd time this week and it is Wednesday
Fuck the walk of shame. I make this shit glorious.
The fact that you arent wearing shoes probably just adds to the classiness
Condom wrapper stuck to my shirt ups the anty
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