Think the blond can even spell "shiksa"?
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I found out that my first kiss was an Italian. Even in kindergarden i knew size mattered.
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I woke up with a black eye, bruised knuckles, wearing women's clothing, in a house I did not recognize, next to a solid 9. Thank you for making 21 special.
Why did I wake up with condoms on all my fingers?
Considering the girl you hooked up with, I'd be concerned about not having one on your penis.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
I need more social interactions that don't involve sex
I knew you were super hungover. But so hungover you fire our house cleaner because her vacuums too loud is excessive
Meeting up with one of your students at your drug dealers house is always an awkward moment
Just whisper "I fucked your boyfriend" in her ear and be done with it.
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Randomize
