I just spent the last hour reading customer reviews on amazon.com for the book "it hurts when I poop." Send help.
redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
i just realized i dont have a sober facebook picture since 2007
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
I dont know why the TSA people are looking at me wierd. I mean there is no way i am the only hungover college girl here with nine tally marks on her hand and last nights glitter on her face
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
i hope this doesn't spoil anything but there are vikings and it is awesome
The cop told me to answer for everyone if there was drinking involved and then i threw up in my Luigi's italian ice that i was eating with a pizza slicer
Just got outta the drunk tank! Happy 21st birthday!
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
How are you getting in?
I know some influential drag queens
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
Randomize
