I won a flip cup tournbment! Why is boot and rally so hard when youre old?
i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
I am midnight drunk by noon
I asked him how he was going to celebrate tomorrow and he said "tits, clits, and bong hits"
lets be honest. she's not NEARLY as much fun to fb creep since she got out of rehab...
You wouldnt be able to explain the can of green beans in my mailbox, would you?
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
So I bought some random chick a shot she puked in her hands then I watched her make out with my roommate
I have reverted to folding laundry while watching porn. how much sadder can my life get?
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
I don't care if his family has ties to the mafia, you go over there, ride his dick until it breaks off, put his dick back on, and keep on riding. Lather, rinse, repeat.
Thanks for the support, sis.
I lick assholes and I wouldn't eat mdma
I'm always down for nudity.
I'm naked, eating straight Nutella, and listening to "Make you feel my love" on repeat. So no. He didn't ask me out.
Randomize
