Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
is there anything more depressing than unpacking condoms from your suitcase that you thought you were going to use on vacation?
Spent the last thirty minutes staring at the wall with Leah. It's definitly moving
We played shuffleboard at the bar last night...another sign we are getting tooooo old.
he will always be the guy i fucked in the hallway.
He came out in cowboy boots and underpants holding a beer while he hugged my mom. I love Montana.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
If a hot cougar texts u and says "back massage, blow job".... you show the fuck up.
Dude at the bar last night came into the bathroom, drop kicked the stall open and start saying lines from happy Gilmore as he was shitting, "go in your home! Are you too good for your home?!"
A check for $9 that I used to buy six boxes of Girl Scout cookies bounced. I think I've hit a new low.
sober me is not impressed with the quality of people that drunk me gives our phone number to
Dude i woke up today by a pile of fried chicken and wearing a bra
.......stop going to frat parties....
Sunday morning breakfast with the boyfriends family. I just puked in the stall at Cracker Barrell. Classy.
His face will be in my vagina later so I'm willing to forgive.
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