Hoooooo maaaaan
Yes?
I'm retarded. Again.
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
I'm pretty sure God is rooting for me with this two gf thing
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
Get out here. Doing shots with the delivery guy. Also, the food is here
I am just pathetic enough to be sitting on the couch with my cat drinking absinthe and vodka watching moulin rouge. Hello, tuesday night.
He's just giving off this "someone be a bitch to me" vibe
Its not college unless your study breaks were to go throw up from blacking out the night before
I packed spaghetti and rum. But panties? Nah
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
I'm in the power napping at parties stage of my life
If he refers to me as slump buster one more fucking time.
What did you give up for lent?
Diet and excersize. And I'm never going back...
Randomize
