oh man you're gonna hate me when you log onto facebook. remember i love you
I am swimming in semen. He must have been holding it in for a special occasion.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Our local strip club now has karaoke. Do you realize what this could mean for my sex life?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Okay, quick math test. If our entire group can do at least 6 shots a night, how much alcohol will be needed to keep us shit faced for the rest of the week? This is for a grade. Anddd, go.
I'm being fed tequila grapes by a girl on stilts...
Legitimate concern. Who am I going to have birthday sex with?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like to take my ritalin one pill at a time with each pill spaced out a couple minutes so I feel like I'm going super saiyan when they kick in.
Dude he did say "let's go cougar hunting" and you KNEW your mom was going out last night...so it's kind of your own fault for not coming
Welp, I just herniated a vocal cord during sex. How was your night?
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
Also, McDonald's breakfast is now 24/7. This is it. This is how I die. Face first in a pile of hashbrowns.
People trash cargo shorts, but I'm like, sorry I had room for beers and you didn't.
Randomize