Well, its 5:30am and you haven't let me in, I guess ill go home
That can be our thanksgiving, vodka and cornbread. Just like the pilgrims.
Dude, I couldn't come. She sounded like a goddamn dying walrus.
so why are there three stressed gay men and a bowl of vomit in the smoke room?
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
i have a feeling i am the only one who can successfully pull off the "slutty kentucky derby" look.
He drank his beer out of his own shoe. Its his "party trick"
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
I have vodka and a slip n slide so of you could come over that would be great
Nothing says male bonding like watching porn with your grandpa
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
You really need to stop getting injured so often it's really starting to negatively impact my sex life. Oh and get well soon. . . no seriously though hurry the fuck up.
I dunno about you, but I consider getting eaten out on the porch of a houseboat in -30c in a bridesmaids dress a northern right of passage
If work found out I was using THEIR paper to write Karate Kid fanfic I'd never hear the end of it.
Randomize
