its like he missed a chap in the "being a guy" handbook and read the bible instead
Yeah, I was googling pictures of sharks, and I accidentally typed "shart." Huge mistake.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
The hookah bar is playing i'm on a boat. I believe in god again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
To be honest I don't know what's worse, the fact that I interupted their shower sex or the fact that I was so drunk I used the adjoining stall anyway
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
I just put my hair into this ponytail & it looks hideous & really cool at the same time. I am dedicating it to the hangover I have
Yah at one point i was listening to metallica and doing pushups last night. I went thru alot of emotions.
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Day drinking straight vodka out of a Mountain Dew can being towed behind a kayak on a raft. And no, there is no time difference, it really is 10 am.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Dude my pants were only on for 20 minutes after she got there.
That's 30 minutes too many.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
I forgot to lock the bathroom door. He walked in, saw me on the toliet, nodded, and walked back out.
Great news. I WILL BE FUCKING IN A BOUNCY HOUSE TOMORROW.
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