Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
quick I need to know all the foods that the very hungry caterpillar ate
What can i say im a girl who smells like weiners.
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
Im glad the only reason we got out of bed today was to get Halloween candy on sale.
That would make regret #10
He was more like the original regret
Please, by all means, tell me what can't be helped by two stiff drinks & a blowjob?
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
10 shots in she's sitting on the floor using the open dishwasher door as a plate to eat her "life giving" pizza.
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
Oh man I missed being single! Two different guys just sent me dick pics during my kid’s little league game.
He said I have the “Denzel Washington” of vaginas.
Randomize
