Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
if i died would you start the facebook group?
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
You were playing beer pong by yourself. Finally someone took the ball and threw it into the bonfire. You sat by it, cried, and contemplated how to get it out. For 45 minutes.
Just in case you were wondering..... I really did just wave goodbye to you with my penis.
Dude I've kinda accepted I may leave Nola with the clap.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Please don't smoke the bong in the bathroom while you shit. It is not a shitting bong.
It's 6 am, I'm drunk, and celebrating the end of finals.Go ahead and ask me where I am...if you guessed a McDonald's playpen then you are correct. Badabababa I'm loving it
I got a blowjob dressed with a t shirt sweatpants and a Fanny pack. Not kidding.
I would come over if there was not the impending fear of me shitting out my brains.
Is banging someone in the national guard considered a state service or a national one?
You know, finding my first grey pube at 34 is FAR more distressing than finding that first grey hair at 13.
I DO NOT FUCKING WANT OR NEED THIS INFORMATION!
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
