and those juicy C cups turned out to be oddly-shaped A's when her padded bra came off.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
so today in my theology class we brought up the proper way to have sex. so rough sex was said by the teacher...I said I know a girl that likes to be choked. sorry but everyone knew it was you
This kid is drunk.
I hope by "this kid" you mean yourself and not some child you have kidnapped and gotten wasted.
And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
WHY ARE YOU SMOKING WEED WHEN YOU JUST HAD A STROKE. AND MORE IMPORTANTLY WHY ARE YOU DOING IT WITHOUT ME.
And I was chasing apple pie moonshine (provided by cops) with bud light limeys. In a golf cart, wearing a tiara.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
I'm mortified. After he finished, he turned to me and said,"So, what did you think of my mom?" WTF Please tell me he was not wondering about that while he was going down on me!!!
I just threw up in my front yard because my roommate was in the bathroom. Fuck New Years Day.
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
Yes. That was the exact moment of my conscience clicking into instant high alert.
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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