She was having a seizure right in front of you, and you asked, "So there's no more donuts?"
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
The poor thing was so drunk they wheeled his motorcycle into the bar. I just dropped him off to pick it up. The best walk of shame ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She apparently grabbed another girl and pulled her into the shower fully clothed. When the girl was like "you need to stop" she curled up into a ball and refused to leave.
Whoa, you know how to pick em.
Responsibility: Hiding your beer when your DWI clients who are out on bond come to talk to you at bars.
I could probably do something when Im able to get enough strength to think about thinking about to stand.
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
oh you know, the usual stuff. getting kicked out of bars and sleeping in cars.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
I made friends with the delivery guy because he had beautiful dread locks and was a Zelda fan. He texted me after he left saying he wasn't trying to be creepy but we should be friends. We're hanging out tomorrow.
How does this kind of shit happen to you?!
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
dude igloo, 4 foot bong, and 3 grams of blue dream. will you be my eskimo buddy?
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