drink some water, pull the trigger, get a bfast sandwich. Only good things.
Cab driver just said he likes mutual masturbation in the cab. Um
Sorry I thought I was a lizard earlier.
your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
If theres one good thing that came out of our relationship its this chicken recipe. And squirting.
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No. I think its because I really and truly know that he is a moron and his future prospects are zoo animals.
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
we didnt plan anything. just randomly met up in the park, both reached into our pockets and each lit up a joint without exchanging words. we're telepathic potheads.
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
Why did you buy a cock ring?
I’m going to propose to his penis
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