Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
never let anyone you met on skype borrow your car. lesson learned.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
My dinner last night was 3000 calories of beer. Slept kneeling on the floor w/ my head on a couch
I just realized I'm not towing a trailer. I thought this whole drive home I was towing a trailer. Wow too high
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I HAVE A GENTLEMANLY VAGINA.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
The woman in the flower onesie is claiming she hasn't been drinking.
Ever since we've gotten back together, it's like the ghosts of booty call's past have been hitting me up. Lol.
I feel like my vagina was just in a fistfight.
Baked goods and tits. Hard to go wrong there.
Oohh. Then yes, he is the Alpha Fuckboy.
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
