Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
it tastes like there's a party in my mouth and everyone is throwing up
my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
so we were pounding it out and someone knocked on the wall and was shouting at us
that didnt stop you
nope
My teachers should feel privileged to see me this morning, after the amount of alcohol I consumed last night.
She is definitely tripolar. Like bipolar but better/worse.
I don't remember you taking the condom off last night. Did you just walk home in it ?
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
We found you walking up the on ramp to the highway carrying a 40 mph speed limit sign with no shoes on. Rough night?
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
I just realized, you're dating a guy named Jameson. That is another level of whiskey dick.
OF COURSE I FUCKED HIM! Did you not read the part about him having red and green Christmas condoms?
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize
