What the hell did I do to get youtube to recommend a video for me called "how to increase your chances of getting pregnant"?
I wonder if I could sublet my bathtub to anyone.
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
You missed out on a serious adventure. Cops were called. We put a chicken in someones house.
I was asking the bouncer, "if I fall will you catch me?" which then turned into "if I jump off the roof will you catch me?" He said no.
YOU STOLE THE WEDDING CAKE?!?!
Only one tier
Tastes like cardboard anyway
Just drug him and when he wakes up say "You just woke up from a coma, we've been married for 5 years." It'll be like The Vow but fucked up.
You have 4 bottles of kahlua in ur drawers but no sox
I chatted up the pastor's son on Grindr during the service. Still ridiculing my decision to go to church this morning?
Meh, all I have to do tomorrow is proctor an AP test. No loud noises and no physical activity allowed for almost 4 hours. Sounds like the perfect recovery period for a hangover.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
We need to find out what drug we took so we can take it everyday from here on out
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
