i half slept with him but i still dont owe you any money
Sometimes, when I'm driving alone I talk to myself in a Russian accent so I think it's my mommy and it calms me down.
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
She actually pushed her roomie out of the way and said 'You already fucked him it's my turn!'
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I feel as though sleeping all day due to the effects of prescription painkillers paid for by union insurance made this the most American day ever for me
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I don't need a lecture. I'm 41. I know I'm an idiot.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
While I was giving him head he told me he had to go door to door the next day and "spread the word of Jesus Christ" I felt like a Disney villain out to steal his virtue.
Randomize
