i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
You know you had good weekend wheb we you hook up with three different girls and you don't feel no pain when u pee in the morning
This is probably the only time in my life I'm going to be able to say I'm going to the hospital too smoke weed and play Mario kart.
No I got myself stoned. With her bowl. She was just a casualty of the War on Sobriety.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
i'm teaching a bunch of people how to grow weed over snapchat. no shame.
I would have cried, probably tears of wine, but cried nonetheless.
I am honestly trying to remember his name. All I can remember is that he had a weird mole, a daughter and a lot of cocaine. Please stop letting me pick up at gay night.
woke up with empty beer can still duct taped into my fists and the word "dove" written on the back of my neck
I'll be perfectly honest; there are times other guys have consented to have sex with me because of my punctuation.
There's lube and condom packets all over the street we missed something awesome.
I told you I couldn't sleep because of the speed and you rolled over and replied "shh. just pretend."
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Guy just rode past on a lowrider bike smoking a blunt, I want his life
I I was gonna wake him up with a blow job but I don't know how he would feel about it.
Randomize
