I'm at the psychiatrist, and this lady is crazy.. she keeps yelling about how her HMO insurance gave her breast cancer? Adderall isn't worth this.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
Hey sis... Don't forget moms day is this sun. And don't get her another gift while you are freakin high this time. The vibrator was embarrassing.
FYI the vibrator was a SUCCESS. She was in a much better mood this last year. Maybe you should get high this time and get a great gift
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he's got a countert top full of yard sale blenders so id say maragita wednesdays is a go.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
Got back to find Sarah in her underwear eating peanut butter and watching Arrested Development with the thermostat at eighty.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Im like a saiyan, last weekends hangover will only make me stronger
He just stopped me mid blow job so he could text his wife asking for TacoBell.
Idk how much of a virgin he is but I'm tryna find out.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
found my cat trying to steal a lighter to hide away for himself. cat what are you doing. don't pocket my lighter.
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