There was so much of it... it was like he poured a bowl of pudding on my face. It's not bad for your hair is it?
We got so high yesterday we tried watching soccer
Hes far too high and trying to explain daylight savings time to me. Help?
they were having a wine tasting so i tasted every wine...then knocked over an entire display of gourmet olives and was asked to leave... but they still let me buy my 6 bottles of wine before escorting me out
he puked in my glove box, looked up at me and said "There's not much to say"
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
I just burped smoke on the bus. Hello 6:48am
I think the closest to heaven you can get in this world is your morning dump after a night of Molly
Well, somebody (me) put on reindeer antlers, crawled around on the floor, and meowed at people... So yeah, I'd say it was "one of those nights"
I have invented a new game to play on campus. It's called "Mormons or Pledges?" It's fantastic.
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
If I get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to celebrate. If I don't get the job, I'm gonna get wasted to forget. Win-Win
I have more important things to worry about than you drowning your cheerios in tequila.
How'd things go with that guy last night?
He threw up in the consol in my car then started crying about his ex girlfriend.
They were shocked that I could handle my liquor so well. I'm half Irish and half Russian. This is what I'm made for
Randomize