I just woke up and i'm wearing a cape and it says sup slut on my ass
I will give you vagina for bag of have'a corn chips.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
Getting sheets for college, what is the thread count that shows the least amount of cumstains?
630.
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Gong!
YOU'RE MARRIED NOW YOU CAN'T KEEP GONGING ME WHEN YOU GET LAID IT DOESN'T COUNT
I'll ask around, all of my friends have girlfriends now for the most part though so they're all dead inside
Just threw up mid-poop. I can't drink like I used to.
His cat just sat there and simultaneously bobbed his head up and down while I blew him
Like seriously how stupid drunk do you have to get befor you start finding dolphin lighters and shit in your undergarments
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
Randomize
