So my shaver died while I was trimming...ya know. And now it is half way done. I don't think there's currently any aesthetic in keeping it this way...
The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
counting down the days left of school on my birth control packet.
let me put this in terms we both understand. he was the crunchwrap supreme of men--the perfect combo of all things manly, gooey and delicious. and ready for instant enjoyment.
Someone played tic tac toe on my abs?
I jerked him off and then punched him in the face for no reason. Typical evening drinking Sailor Jerry's.
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
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