at one point last night, you were literally auctioning me off. "reeeally drunk hot girl ! we'll start the bidding at an ice cold corona. oh, we have a bidder! do i hear a shot of whiskey? going once, going twice.."
youre welcome
your friend did not want a bj. we need to leave. this is very awkward.
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I will blow you tomorrow if you bring me food tonight. Like a payment plan
Based on your 5AM twitter activity I gather you found MORE FREE COKE??
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
You've seen the quality of dick pics I normally get. The bar is high.
I don't know. I wanna do you but I also want a cheeseburger.
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
We walked into the RA's room and he said "is that alcohol" and I screamed "IT'S WATER" and ran out and Vanessa slammed the door and started making out with him.
when I said eat the rich I didn't mean like that but here we are sucking that capitalist dick
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