How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Who keeps a bong in their car??
Kids who graduated high school two weeks ago.
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
He looked me in the chest and said "I think I was visited by the titty fairy last night"
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I keep forgetting that I only have two nostrils.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
He said i got a new job lets blow this money he bought 4 bottles at the club he is now crying after seeing the reciept
I don't know if we can compare high school reunions anymore. The keg stands started before 7.
Learn from my mistakes, you naive soul: Gay love triangles are just as dangerous as straight love triangles.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
I just saw your mom take a body shot off an undergrad, please tell me you're somewhere near by.
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
soo... how was my night?
i have to pee so bad and he is sleeping and idk where the bathroom or my clothes are!!!
Randomize
