i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
He was so bad, he was dry humping me and his dick was nowhere close to my vagina.
Well we were just driving down the street, there was a realtor and a couple walking up the porch of a house for sale, mark sticks his head out, opens his mouth to say something, pukes all down the side of the car, pauses, and yells "THIS IS A PHENOMAL NEIGHBORHOOD YOURE GONNA LOVE IT"
In the memo line of the check she wrote sexual healing.
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
I always enjoy the bewildered gaze as I buy chips, salsa and beer @ 0745.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
I never thought I'd say this, but I think I just saw the hottest pregnant chick alive.
OMG CHARGE YOUR PHONE I NEED TO KNOW IF THIS IS A GOOD PICTURE OF MY ASS
It's not so much that I'm giving her money because I threw up on her floor. It's more like I'm paying her to never ever mention it again.
He's on the floor in just a Burberry tie. All my girl parts just tapped out.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
Randomize
