make sure to take notes today. there is a guy in a wheelchair who might be getting a DUI from a cop on horseback. I'm gonna see this through.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
I feel like we had some profound moment last night, but I can't really recall much past your ass turning up the volume on the radio.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I just stood up and am wasted. I think I just admitted to my mom that I am trying to fuck everyone in New York because they're skinny and ethnically ambiguous. Meanwhile, happy hour isn't over yet.
I'm gonna make a therapist very happy and very wealthy this semester.
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
I want to go out and have good clean fun.
Ok, but that does not include Bud Light Platinum and your vagina.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
I think I gave a random lady a dildo
Again?!
I probably would do him if given the chance but how awkward would Bible study be after that.
Randomize
