I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
Now you know why i just sit on the toilet and scream
He thanked me for being "his little blond pogo stick last night". Good thing?
i felt obligated to tell him happy birthday since we trashed his house and i fucked his friend in his basement
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
You don't understand. If you watched a video of the shenanigans that occurred in my life over the past 48 hours you would gasp worse than the girl who witnessed me puking in my bag at the children's hospital
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I'm really sorry I hooked up with your student on the dance floor..
An orgasm and grocery shopping is the appropriate start to every Monday.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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