we're blogging at a bar
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
This is the worst date ever. Pls kill me. No, wait, scratch that, stick to the original plan of killing Paris Hilton, I'll live though this
Idk if this white stuff in my shower is conditioner or... something else?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
You skyped me last night to show me the girl passed out on your bed.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She said " I'm going to get her back one day soon for putting extacy in my pop while I drove her to whislter" just a heads up.
Will do. If it all falls thru I'm just gonna set up a sprinkler in my back yard and run thru it while taking jello shots. Perfect alternative to my 29th bday.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I specialize in how to hang out and party with randoms after you've hooked up with them. Not in feelings.
There's a hole in our hallway wall. Don't hate me. I'll fix it. It's only about the size of a beach ball. I promise to never scale walls in our apartment ever again. Don't hate me. I love you.
Just a heads up that Dad just brought home a new Porsche and the sales girl he bought it from.
Umm okay. What are they doing?
They’re in the hot tub
Can I get divorced when I grow up?
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