why is there a picture of someone wearing Tevas with socks taped on the wall?
i never realize how drunk i am until i start using people as human stripper poles
the facebook you made of my ass has 10 times more friends than i do.
From the prices on this menu it looks like I have no choice. I have to blow him.
I'm pretty sure we got the cab driver deported
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
I just really wish I could go back and unsex him. Waste of my vagina.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
He asked if we were going to take advantage of his drunken state. When we said no he tired to show us what we were missing out on. It was so sad it almost made him cute.
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
Randomize
