THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
you fell asleep spooning with his golden retriever. im not sure if thats more degrading for you or the dog
She fucking ripped my chandelier out of my ceiling. How does that make her a keeper?
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I was masturbating in my bed this morning when my ipod alarm went off and it started playing "show me the meaning of being lonely"
That's some primal shit right there. My vagina is all like CONSUME HIM AND HIS FRUIT HE WILL GIVE YOU SONS!
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
We're trying to make our wedding vows nice but meeting on OkCupid fucks that up entirely.
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Your boyfriend being in jail is really helping my social life! #GotASingleDrinkingBuddyAgain
i just found a lighter in my bra... from last night, and its 7:43pm...
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