Sometimes I stick my finger in my own ass and pretend it’s a vagina. I think it’s kinda weird. What do you think?
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I told her I was horny and she said to forget it because she has vagina drama.
WHAT IN THE HELL IS VAGINA DRAMA?!
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So his "youporn" cam totally caught me stealing quesadilla leftovers.
HOW AM I SUPPOSED TO LOOK FUCKABLE IN AN ALL NEON SPANDEX JUMPSUIT?
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
Listen, everyone has a price and mine is free taco bell.
Why do they give me cups on $8 pitcher night? I HAVE A PITCHER.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
He said I was doing well, so I stopped mid blow job to compliment his grammar. You could say I like intellectuals
I have this vague feeling that I was involved in a dance off with a homeless man?
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
My school has hired a professional rum bottle juggler for our dining hall this evening.
Working from home has been great for my sex life! A few of my neighbors are in open marriages and several more wish they were!!!
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